I’m just going to put it out there…October and November have been hard for me. The last few weeks have been a journey of trying to make sense of what’s been going on. To process this, I’ve focused on finding ways to regulate my nervous system and sought support from both my spiritual development coach and my therapist. In this blog, I want to share my journey with you.
In October, I began noticing a strange, heavy energy around me. As November rolled in, it became more intense—I started having nightmares and carried a persistent feeling of heaviness. It’s important to note that this wasn’t depression or something within my control. It was a deep sensitivity to the energy around me, as though I was absorbing the chaos, unrest, and emotions of others.
I picked up on this energy everywhere—interactions, news, even in passing conversations. It was overwhelming, and I couldn’t shake it. During a conversation with my amazing spiritual development coach, she helped me put this feeling into words. She said it was as though I was seeing life in grey instead of the vibrant colors I typically see. Her insight hit home. Yes, life felt flat, heavy, and muted—and I couldn’t figure out how to bring back the vibrancy.
I kept asking myself, What is wrong with me? I have so much to be grateful for, yet I felt “off” and often sad. But I knew this wasn’t sadness in the traditional sense—it was a reflection of the external energies I was carrying. My spiritual coach and therapist both reminded me of something essential: I needed to nurture myself and reconnect with my heart. My coach told me, “You’re in your head. What is your heart telling you right now? What does it feel?” That question was a game-changer. It shifted my focus and reminded me of the wisdom my heart holds.
Taking time for myself can feel indulgent, but I knew I needed a reset. A planned trip to Grand Rapids to visit my son, Cole, and his girlfriend, Olivia, became an opportunity to practice self-love and care.
When I arrived at my hotel, I found a thoughtful surprise waiting for me—flowers from my partner. That evening, I curled up in bed and allowed myself to fully relax, watching a cheesy Christmas movie on my laptop. For the first time in weeks, I slept deeply and peacefully, waking up after 10 hours in my cozy flower pajamas.
The next day, I treated myself to a quiet moment in the hotel restaurant. As I watched the snow fall outside, I enjoyed a warm grilled cheese sandwich and tomato bisque. It was simple, but it grounded me. I felt lighter. The heavy energy of the world wasn’t gone, and I was still sensitive to it, but I could manage it better now.
I’m looking forward to spending the next couple of days recharging with Cole and Olivia, and maybe even connecting with one of my USH mom friends. This pause is just what I needed before diving into the Christmas season.
If you’re feeling the weight of the world or sensing chaotic energy around you, here are some simple tips to help reset and find your balance:
1. Listen to Your Heart: Take a moment to pause and connect with your inner self. Ask, “What is my heart telling me? What does it feel?” This small act can help you shift from your headspace into a place of deeper connection.
2. Practice Self-Love Without Guilt*: Taking time for yourself isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. Whether it’s watching a lighthearted movie, taking a walk around the block, journaling, or simply resting, allow yourself to embrace self-care.
3. Prioritize Sleep: Deep, restorative sleep can do wonders for resetting your nervous system. Create a bedtime ritual you love, whether it’s cozy pajamas, calming music, or a warm drink.
4. Savor the Small Moments: Whether it’s enjoying a favorite meal, watching snow fall, or just sitting in silence, grounding yourself in the present moment can help you find peace amidst chaos.
5. Lean on Support: Don’t hesitate to reach out to a trusted coach, therapist, or friend. Sometimes, an outside perspective or a supportive conversation can bring clarity and relief.
6. Change Your Environment: Even a small shift—like taking a walk, visiting a friend, or staying at a hotel—can provide fresh energy and a sense of renewal.
7. Focus on What Brings You Joy: Spend time with loved ones, indulge in hobbies, or revisit activities that make you smile. Joy is a powerful healer.
Navigating periods of heaviness and sensitivity isn’t easy, especially when it feels like you’re absorbing the world’s energy. But by taking intentional steps to care for yourself, you can find balance and begin to see life in color again. Remember, you don’t need to control everything around you—you just need to find ways to nurture and reconnect with yourself. You aren’t alone.
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